HNT-The First of many!

I have come across HNT (Half-Nekkid Thursday), a semi-tradition seen here on some blogs and a very cool idea that I'm more than willing to participate in (hey, any chance to get nekkid and I'm in!)

I've searched for some orgin and rules on the subject and have found this at Osbasso's blog:

The Guidelines

I offer these guidelines for "Half-Nekkid Thursday":

• In that North American, Puritanical way that most of my readers think, "Nekkid", or its variations, somehow insinuates sex, or its variations. WRONG!! The purpose of "Half-Nekkid Thursday" is not to see sex acts! It is the celebration of exposure. Of your big toe. Of your breastbone. Of your knuckles. Of your uvula. Whatever. Of course, sex acts can qualify, so if you want to post those.....
  
• "Nekkid" is not the same as nude! Again, nude qualifies, but it is not a requirement!
  Pictures should be taken of you or by you. Don't be going to some internet site and downloading "Half-Nekkid" pics. And don't use Uncle Bob's pictures from Spring Break '72, either. Let's try to keep this fairly "real".
  
• You don't necessarily have to be the subject of the picture. By the same token, if you're not, then the subject(s) should be known to you. No fair going to the beach and snapping pictures left and right. Yes, they might be "Half-Nekkid", but they don't follow the spirit of "Half-Nekkid Thursday".
  
• While animals can be included in a "Half-Nekkid Thursday" picture, they are not the focus, therefore cannot be the subject. If an animal is all that keeps your picture "Half-Nekkid" rather than "Full-Nekkid", that's OK.
  
• You are allowed a very limited number of cute-kids-in-the-tub type of pictures. We're interested in YOU!
  
• Use some originality with your shots. Facial shots should be limited. Artsy body landscapes, conversely, are highly encouraged. If a partner/family member is needed to take the picture, that's OK.
  
• Props can help you with creativity, and their use is encouraged, but not necessary.
  
• As we get into this, you may find that you want to post more than one picture for "Half-Nekkid Thursday". I would discourage this practice unless absolutely necessary. You should hold some pictures in reserve, in case you find yourself without a new picture down the road.
  
• While I can hardly control when you post pictures on your own blogs, let's try to keep "Half-Nekkid Thursday" special, and post "Half-Nekkid" pics only on Thursdays. If you feel the urge to post them more than once a week, I might recommend just emailing them out, rather than posting.
  
• Tattoos are certainly an acceptable subject, regardless of location. Scars are also acceptable, but please respect the others who visit "Half-Nekkid Thursday" on a regular basis. Spread out the scar pictures over a few weeks' time, please!
  
• Speaking of scars--If you use a picture of a scar, it must be accompanied by some sort of humorous anectdote as to how you got it. For a long, but good example, go here.
  
• Other skin conditions might not be acceptable, due to good taste. These include, but are not limited to warts, zits, lesions, ingrown hairs, boils, open sores, peeling skin, scabies, rashes, or any other assorted gross things. I'm not saying that you can't post them. Just use your best judgement, for the sake of the rest of us.
  
• When referring to "Half-Nekkid Thursday", please spell it correctly! Not Naked, not Neked, not Nakid. It's "Half-Nekkid Thursday".
  
• It's very important to not be dissing other's submissions! We're all going to have half-hearted entries from time to time. None of us is better than the other. One the other hand, it's completely acceptable to heap praise upon those that deserve it!
  
• IMPORTANT!--Remember to visit my current "HNT" post and leave a comment indicating that you've posted a picture for "Half-Nekkid Thursday". Consider my blog as the informational kiosk for "Half-Nekkid Thursday". You'll be able to see who is joining the tradition. Commenting is much easier for all concerned, rather than updating my blog each time someone posts their picture. I will try to keep the Blogroll in my sidebar updated each week.

So, as my first HNT, here's my post! Is it wrong that being half nekkid really gets me this giddy?

I decided to go with one of my best of assests =) But honestly sometimes I think they are a bit ridiculously large...it's almost overkill. Most of all I feel like I am shaming A-cups everywhere. I mean a C-cup would be just bragging, but a DDD-cup...that's just down right cruel haha. Enjoy!

Knock knock

You know your slave is doing a good job when he stops you in your tracks and he isn't even there...  

Today walking thru my kitchen I paused briefly because I thought I smelled my slave. Yes, I said smell. I have a very keen sense of smell and often associate smells with people. 

My slave wears a cologne that I have come to long and request he wear whenever he sees me; it is his scent. Almost religiously after he leaves my apartment, my sheets, clothes, hair, couch, and anything else he has touched or brushed passed smells like him. I thought I smelled it today in the kitchen. I kept going to the front door and seeing if he was waiting on the other side because sometimes he does that until I open the door for him. It took me a few minutes to realize that it was his collar on the front door leaving behind his alluring aroma. Ahh...what a wonderful aroma it is...

We knew it all along...

So a chemist, a film and television expert and a psychologist walk into an S&M club to watch couples play a little rough… No, that’s not the beginning of a joke but an actual, honest to goodness study about the relationships of couples which practice a variety of sadomasochistic activities. And as it turns out, bondage and domination can bring couples closer together provided that both partners enjoyed themselves. This sounds like a no brainer at first, but we have to consider how S&M play was originally perceived by psychology

Until the late 1980s, sadomasochism was viewed as a psycho-sexual disorder and doctors saw all relationships which included bondage, domination, consensual pain and power exchange as pathological. The third edition of the Diagnostic Statistical Manual, or the DSM III, labeled pretty much all kinds of sadomasochistic activities as proof that the patient had a sexual dysfunction to be treated. But a number of research projects started finding that relationships in which S&M play was a form of intimacy, weren’t actually as uncommon or as rough as most early treatises on sexual health had assumed and that sadomasochism was enjoyed by many people in stable partnerships, with good education and perfectly normal childhoods. As the researchers try to politely note, the original ideas of BDSM in general were based more on the societal opinions of the enthusiasts than factual evidence. 

Now, just watching S&M enthusiasts enjoying themselves is more of a fun Friday night than an actual research project which is why the researchers analyzed the production of testosterone and the stress hormone cortisol in those who engaged in bondage, spanking, power exchange and pain and pleasure routines. Their findings were a little surprising. Instead of both partners reacting to the stress of the activities with extra testosterone and cortisol, only the submissive men and women registered a hormonal reaction. The dominant partners maintained the same baseline levels before and after their S&M play. On the psychological end of the study, the men and women who said that their experience that night went well, reported that they felt closer to their partners and were happier with the relationship than those who were left unsatisfied. So in other words, a good night of consensual masochism brings a couple closer together says the study’s conclusion. And the survey data seems to support this idea. 

But I wonder if that’s really so. Usually, the main component in S&M play is the trust. Couples in the lifestyle have a lot of faith in their partners and for that to happen, they generally need to be close and have a good baseline level of relationship happiness before experimenting with S&M, bondage or power exchanges. If the experience is a letdown, it’s a disappointment for both the dominant partner (the top) and the submissive (the bottom) and can be seen as a breach of the trust that got them to agree to the experiment or even suggest it in the the first place. But even though it’s disappointing, it doesn’t mean that it leaves a permanent mark on the relationship. The disappointment might last a day or two and closeness can come from other activities both partners enjoy. Provided that this study was a convenience sample of 58 people over one night and recorded their impressions for that one night only, you might not want to rush to the S&M club nearest to you in hopes of repairing wounded relationships with a little rough play just yet. Unless your partner suggests it of course, and you’re into the idea… 

See: Sagarin, B., et al. (2008). Hormonal Changes and Bonding in Consensual Sadomasochistic Activity Archives of Sexual Behavior, 38 (2), 186-200 DOI: 10.1007/s10508-008-9374-5

Taken from www.worldofweirdthings.com

Rant: Foresekin or not to foreskin...it's not really a question

I was talking with the bf the other night when the topic of foreskin came up. Yes, we have the strangest conversations at 4am. But, for those of you who have not had the pleasure, foreskin is that nifty extra skin covering the penis when it has not been hacked...er...circumsized. It is undoubtedly one of my favorite things about the male body. My slave (sadly) does not have said treasure but his penis will do nonetheless.

I've been hearing since high school that women detest and sometimes are even disgusted by foreskin, and even more often all together write a guy off who has foreskin! This to me sounds like poppycock! (No pun intended)

To women who have not/will not/are repulsed by/refuse to think about foreskin, here's some words of wisdom: You are missing out!

I'm not sure if I missed this whole memo on "Keep 100 Feet or More from Foreskin" because I slept with mostly European guys growing up (who apparently are less keen on the idea of circumcision) or if I'm just that big of a ho' that I don't discriminate. I usually employ a "No Cock Left Behind" motto with many men I meet.

But, I feel unlike women, who, when their breasts are "too small", "too large", "lopsided", or just otherwise "unworthy" they can receive breast augmentation. Whereas men are pretty much stuck with their goods. I mean sure, there's stretching, and penis pumps (don't use them on a regular basis), and even the fabled "Penis Transplant"...but generally speaking they've got to make the best with what they've got.

If you are one of the many women who are anti-foreskin or a man who has been shunned based off this alone, then here are some quick myth busters about foreskin:

1. It's dirty. It's not "dirty" or less hygienic. Many men have and should be taught how to clean UNDER their foreskin. Once done it is just (if not more) lickable as the next penis.
2. It makes sex difficult. It really won't get in the way. Once a man is erect the foreskin does this cool trick of rolling back so the penis can do it's intended job: pleasure you.
3. Less is more...wrong! Foreskin adds more skin to the penis, which is always a good thing! It also helps a lot when giving hand-jobs in giving you more to grab.
4. It means he's a heathen. Not true, though the Jewish did start the tradition of circumcision (but are slowly starting to move away from it), you really can't hold it against the guy as it wasn't his choice. Also primarily the fact that if you're seeing his penis you can't be all that innocent yourself =)
5. Doctors recommend it. On the contrary, in 1999 The American Academy of Pediatrics has actually taken a stand AGAINST circumcising stating that there is no real benefit to performing the surgery.
6. Being circumcised protects against AIDS and other STDs. Umm...who started this blatant lie? No, No, NO. Really no explanation is needed, except always, always, ALWAYS use protection.
7. Everyone else is circumcised. Actually the male circumcision rate worldwide is only 15% (but is still only 60% in the US). That's a lot of penis still with their natural jackets.
8. It's a painless process done when they are babies. Last time I checked infants could feel pain. The initial part of the process involves a forced separation of the foreskin, which is fused to the glans (head) in much the same way as a fingernail is joined to the finger. It was researched that circumcised male infants have an increased pain response in vaccinations 4 to 6 months later. Circumcision appears to lower the pain threshold.
9. It's just a small bit of skin, it won't matter if it's gone. The foreskin has three known functions: protective, immunological, and sexual. It contains about 10,000 highly specialized nerve endings and several feet of blood vessels. An adult male foreskin, if unfolded and spread out, would be about the size of index card. Some men circumcised in adulthood report a significant decrease in sexual pleasure and comfort because of the loss of sensitive nerve endings
10. ...and this one is my favorite: He'll masturbate more with foreskin. Hahahaha. He's male, he has a working penis, foreskin or not honey he's polishing off just as much as the next guy.

This all comes down to this, embrace the foreskin ladies! It's like a gift that has been wrapped perfectly just for you. And let's be honest...who doesn't like a present every now and then?

Could this be?

Today officially signifies the first day of my decision.

Yes, I have chosen a slave to consider training and beyond.

After months and months of looking I am glad that I have waited and was not swayed by empty promises, pretty faces, nice cars, or misguided servitude. Many things were considered in choosing my slave:

• Stats (age, height, appearance)
• Willingness
• Obedience
• Potential
• ...and most of all Desire (mine and the slave's)

I am confident that my new slave will not displease me. He was happier than I imagined he would be when I offered him the task and that in return made me happy!

He has the most beautiful eyes I have ever seen, a cute but mischievous smile, and he follows instructions with vigor. Maybe Collarme isn't such a bad site after all.

....good things await us.

And I was smiled upon...

I was beginning to think that I might have picked the wrong fetish to pursue...

My less than enthusiastic dealings with many of the men who have messaged me on Collarme was starting to take a toll on my optimistic outlook.

But then I discovered something....
The Video Chatrooms =)

I have found a great new past-time and and even better way to communicate with people (especially if locally) rather than sending random messages back and forth. I have met a lot of fun people who are interesting and cute too!

Then something even better happened...
I met someone tonight from the site.

He was exactly as he said he was (for once), and possibly more. He's very sweet, has his heart in the right place and more importantly he is very willing to serve this Mistress in any way I see fit. As much as that turns me on I am just excited nonetheless to have found someone who wasn't:

A) In another country
B) Over 35
C) Unattractive
D) Married
E) All of the above

I spoke with the bf tonight about it, before I meet with my potential slave, and he still stands by his decision that he is "okay" with anything I do in this realm. I'm very surprised because even though he, himself, is submissive in nature I thought he wouldn't agree to me having a slave or sub. But, alas he has been very supportive in his adventures into the BDSM world with me. I know he doesn't quite understand it and doesn't participate in it, but the fact that he lets me (well let's be honest no man lets me do anything!) practice and he's accepting of it and that's what really counts.

I will sleep easy tonight knowing that Friday I will see my potential slave again...

Submissive enough?

In my search for a submissive, I have found one.

Somehow, that search has ended and sparked a search for something more...possibly a slave.

Don't get me wrong, my quiet sub is okay.
He's just not great.
He doesn't make me feel alive the way I did before.

This may not be entirely his fault but as my sub I expect him to strive to please me.

Instead he strives to be compliant. He doesn't seem to have anything that gets him going, he just follows suit with me. Also since he is a sub and not a slave, we don't always engage in D/s activities. Sometimes we watch tv, eat dinner, drink, smoke, basically anything but the good stuff (i.e. spanking, handcuffing, gagging, etc).

I understand, I'm the Dominant one here, it's my ballgame, I run the show. I would feel much more inclined if he were more open about things. He seems to be insanely shy (he won't watch movies that embarrass the main character because it affects him), he's pretty quiet, and, his penis hates condoms...every time I get the two of them together one shrinks down in disobedience...guess which one?

And he seems to want to have sex a lot more than he wants to be submissive. I often find him topping from the bottom and being quite forceful with his intentions. I have rebuffed him numerous times but my tactics are weakening and soon I may have to get bitchy. I suppose it is partly my fault for getting tipsy as well a few times and going along with sex.

But, it is here I have found desiring all the things I miss in a slave. In what my sub lacks I long for in someone who will hand it over readily.

Perhaps it is time to delve deeper into the rabbit hole once again...

Slave, Subs, Tops, Bottoms, oh my!

I was having a very heated debate online today (and yes, I know arguing on the internet is like running in the Special Olympics...) but sometimes I like to get my blood boiling.

Today was a just a mild disagreement, no harm was done =). But an ignorance just on the cusp of the scene was revealed to me. Many people do not know the difference between a sub/submissive and a slave.

Make no mistake there is a difference.

And anyone who has tagged themselves as either will gladly tell you so. As will the Dominants of those. Their relationship is often abbreviated D/s (usually with a lowercase for the submissive to show their role), also described as Tops and bottoms respectively.

So for edification I will give my own definition of the two. This is in no one way the only or correct definition, it is merely defined from my perspective:

Sub/Submissive/Bottom

Usually used to designate a person who is passive. They are usually on the receiving end of the relationship. They are obedient to an extent. They usually explain their limits to their Dominants (who respect them) and their role is merely a session for them. Once they are not in session (an increment of time spent with the Dominant) then they go about their day-to-day lives as normal. The time with the Dominant is commonly referred to as "play". They have a wide range of free will and usually only do tasks that they are comfortable with or have requested.

Slave

This is usually assigned to someone with a more intense acting-out of being a submissive. For them being a slave is not just "play" but more so a lifestyle. Their attitude or reactions to certain situations don't reflect being in the presence of the Dominant because they are always in "slave-mode". They usually go as far as being "trained" to please their Dominant, whereas many submissives just follow orders on a session-by-session basis. Slaves don't exhibit free will. They do whatever the Dominant commands (so long as it is not overly harmful)

Switch

I somewhat hate this term and concept but nonetheless it exists. This would be a person a who either a submissive or a Dominant depending on their current mood. It's handy in a large group when you need to even things out but personally I think it's unrealistic and somewhat confusing. Unless of course you pair two switches together, then everything is perfect!

Commonalities

Both slaves and submissives have submissive personalities. They are essentially allowing someone else to have temporary control over them. They both seek for someone to make decisions for them and to command them into various scenarios.

There's your brief lesson for the day readers, now remember this when a girl says she wants to be your slave not your submissive...means you can do more beautifully tragic things to her *evil grin*

Throwing out the net...what fishies will I find?

So I've found a new site to look for submissives on.
Baring that the Craigslist thing doesn't work out (and honestly when does it ever?)

I have only been on Collarme for a few days but already my mailbox has been flooded with responses to my profile. I find it ungodly amusing that many of these pathetic men write me in an attempt to tell me they are exactly what I want. When in actuality they have not even read what I have specified.

I KNOW WHAT I WANT.

It is not you. I want a man who will submit to me wholeheartedly and with an open-mind. I have had almost a dozen submissives and slaves, and one puppy bitch who I was merely co-training. I am quite experienced in my BDSM realm. My bedroom is my world and I am the ruler. What I seek is someone who understands this bond we share will not be merely physical. We may not have sex for days, weeks, or even months, if you are displeasing to me. This experience should encompass body, mind, and soul. That is the submissive I am looking for.

A man who realizes I am better at deciding what is best for him and that when in my presence he is there to serve me however I see fit.

My happiness for his happiness...

Slaving ain't easy...

8 months is a long time for anything to happen.

You can conceive and practically have a child
Take a mini road trip that sweeps you up and you extend your stay
Get over a bad breakout of herpes
Lose 30 lbs
Or even stop talking to your friends and obtain a new circle of people...all within that time frame.

One thing I have found you can not do in 8 months, no matter how hard you try, is to find a slave. Somehow this coveted treasure eludes me.

I don't remember it being this hard on the West Coast to find someone very much in the scene (by scene I refer to the S&M scene) the way I am. And, I don't think I'm that hardcore into the scene. My interests are pretty mild (I think) compared to most *Dommes or Mistresses.

I'm not into:

• Mommy/Child role play
• Crossdressing
• Public humiliation
• Female supremacy
• Fisting
• Pony/Puppy play
• Heavy CBT
• Watersports

I've noticed a lot of Dommes seek to degrade their slaves or submissives, whereas I feel I just want to expose and employ their given nature. I am naturally aggressive and Dominant, therefore I get along better with people who are submissive. People who won't disagree with me or want to stand toe-to-toe all the time (i.e. other Dominant natured people). I like the lighter sides of BDSM and the internal aspects.

I very much enjoy:

• Collars
• Light bondage/Mental bondage
• Exhibitionism
• *Objectification
• Begging
• Blindfolds
• Spanking (I love the sound it makes!)
• Obedience Training

Well I guess the only thing to do is to try different avenues to find the one I seek. Granted I do have a boyfriend now. But, honestly I have been searching for a sub/slave much longer than a boyfriend. I am not sure how my new boyfriend will feel when I do obtain someone to worship the ground I walk on...