Xdressing: Confusing fun for all

A few weekends ago I had the pleasure of attending my first crossing dressing party. I've been to cross dressing events or shows in the past, but this was the first event where I was invited to participate.

A week prior to the event I tried desperately to find a way to strap down my 46DDDs. Duct tape. Extra small sports bras. Ace bandages. Saran wrap. But nothing worked. It seemed these babies were here to stay (as usual!). So I decided to figure out other ways to include them in my costume.

My last resort was to dress up as an old guy and include them as part of the prop belly. When I started to look like something out of Big Momma's House, I decided maybe I just wasn't cut out for cross dressing lol.

During one my search for tips and tricks of the trade, I actually ran across a website devoted completely to a phenomenon called "FemSkin". For those of you who are as clueless as I was, it is a full silicone body suit that a male can wear to give him a female shape and working parts. You can get the full suit, just top half, just bottom half (with a neat catheter type deal for you to urinate without removing the suit), or just the good naughty bits. At $2500 to $3500 these suits are for the hardcore. But I couldn't help thinking that they look as if they really could fool a few unsuspecting, possibly drunk victims.  

This was definitely a world where I was out of my element.

My original plans also included myself and sweet sub dressing as a deliciously slutty cheerleader but he was unable to make it so I coached the bf into coming along. In actuality, he was a bit more excited about it than I anticipated.

"Should I shave my arms or legs?" he asked eagerly.

To which I exasperated and rolled my eyes.

Once we arrived the party was well on its way. People were mingling and drinking.  We changed and I didn't feel too left out since I had opted for very minimal cross play in a tie and Fedora as we hopped into the groove of the party. I got into Photography mode as I snapped pictures of everyone posing in the play room. They are a very photogenic and camera friendly folk, I love it!

Several of the males also dressed up and it was scary how well some of them looked! But alas I don't think I've changed my feeling on seeing men in dresses other than for my amusement or punishment.

Hard as I tried to imagine everything under the dress my mind kept trailing back to the cut of the dress, or color, or hem lol. I think panties and uniforms are my limit on what I find as pleasing feminine attire on males...but it's always fun to play with every now and then.

Sex Toy Review: G Female Stimulating Gel

Recently I was approached to conduct reviews for the sex toy site TheirToys.

I mean really beyond hearing I'd get free samples of sexy toys and items, there was nothing more I needed to hear haha but I promise not to daunt you with an overflow of reviews...don't worry my blog isn't going rouge.

So, after looking thru a small selection of items I decided on the  

Love the container color!

G Stimulating Gel.

It contained all natural ingredients and promised to "improve female sexual sensation, arousal, and pleasure".

It's hard for me to believe an item can make me (or any woman) more aroused and this was no surprise when I secretly (to my bf) applied it while working on the computer. I waited for the "arousing" to consume me but it never really manifested.
 
Later that evening I applied it during a particularly engaging foreplay session. I have to say I was pleasantly surprised by it's application. It was quick to apply (just put the clear liquid on your finger and rub on the clit) and the lubrication it provided was intense experience. It was cool at first and then a bit tingly; as if you had a breath mint in your nether regions. Once we actually got to the main event I did become aware of an increased sensitivity and that was definitely a crowd pleaser! They also have other speciality lubes available online.

Overall I'd use this product again, but sparingly...one to two squirts was more than enough to get the slip-n-slide motion going.

Getting to know you

With a little under two weeks left for my sub-hunt things have started to pick up a bit for me.

I am definitely interacting with more submissives on and offline than ever before. Is it wrong to feel fucking womanly knowing I am chatting with at least seven twelve fourteen different potentials?

Though all this exploration has me wondering if there was a key element I have been ignoring up until now. I went out with nurse sub again for dinner and he was a perfect gentleman. His smile is infectious and we always have a good laugh-fest about random life happenings when we are together.

He's smart, he's funny, he's cute, he's respectful, he's independent yet I can still identify his submissive side.

So then, what is the problem you may be thinking?

It's that I am getting to "know" him. 

I am finding that the more I get to know a submissive the less I can see myself doing with them. My usual protocol is one initial meeting with no play and then if things click, we play on the next meeting. I have not been following that method very closely this year. Every sub I have met with so far I've had the preliminary "verify you're not a creeper" meeting and then we've continued on that way. We just keep meeting for drinks, dinner, movies, shopping trips, etc.

It's not that I want to completely objectify my submissives but I think our paths are leading to deeper connections that blocking me from wanting to do Mistressy things with them. This all came to me as a revelation as I was talking with nurse sub.

He had texted me before our meeting: "In the mood for anything in particular?"

I believe he was thinking of food but little did he know I was not, as this came only moments after I had lamented aloud how I wanted a boy at my feet while I worked. Once we arrived at dinner and began talking, I explained to him that his open-ended question had impeccable timing.

"You should have told me, I would've came over to sit at your feet or do whatever you needed," was his response.

But I instantly thought:
He works nearly 70 hour work weeks. Wouldn't he be tired?
Wouldn't he would rather have a relaxing day off instead of serving me?

How can I ask him to take care of my whims when he does that everyday for others?

These are NOT the thoughts I want to have about my submissives. Yes, I want to care about them as human beings but I also want to use them...I just don't want to use them. Trust me, I'm just as confused as you dear readers and it seems my big heart has struck again and is trying to prevent me from being the most of my Mistress self.

As nurse sub and I parted ways I told him, "Next time no dinner, well perhaps a small dinner...but definitely dessert afterward."

I'm so glad this is metaphorical dessert because I can't bake worth shit, but my paddle and I can whip any boy into shape!

While the cat's away, the yuppies will play

I definitely get the phrase "a New York minute" after visiting this week. The city was enthralling, bustling, and confusing as always. It's almost like being home when I am there for an extended period. And this visit I really I had to tear myself away to head back to DC.

I initially went for some work and to visit a few friends but it became evident the city had other plans for me. On Friday I went to a local BDSM group. They met in downtown Manhattan and it was a group geared towards the younger players in the scene. I was really psyched to see how their groups compared to back home so I arrived on time only to realize, the group hadn't specified how to recognize them. Once I poked around the restaurant where they were meeting I found a hand written sign sagging on the table that just said their group's call letters. Further inspection of the folks gathered round didn't show off their more kinky sides the way I thought the DC group subtly did. These people were dressed pretty smartly for a 24-hour diner which made me glad I had chosen to dress up as well.

I dragged the bf along with me so that I would have a familiar face and to expose him just a little more to the scene; not that I want to convert him, I just don't want him conjuring images of the people I hang with that are unrealistic. We were greeted briefly...very briefly and then promptly ignored. I tried jumping in the conversation over the course of the meal but they definitely had a clique feeling to their group. It was obvious they all knew each other as they traded inside jokes and hushed laughter. I found out who was "in charge" (if you want to count a whiny, overly anxious, unorganized man-child as a leader) and tried to introduce myself again but I was brushed off. As new members came they scrambled not to be placed at the end of the table with myself..."the new girl". It was like I had cooties! I'll admit, I wasn't being loud or overly aggressive in the situation but that's because I wanted to make a good first impression, you only get one chance right? And they were tanking as I found their behavior down-right rude.

And just as I was about to leave a delightfully adorable girl with a small but simple collar sat next me. She smiled and I thought, "Now here's a friendly face". The group acknowledged her but then proceeded to also keep her out of the loop. Her, myself and my bf all chatted for almost an hour and I learned that she was young, new to the group (this was her second meeting) and looking to make friends. We exchanged our Fetlife info and I can at least be grateful that if nothing else, I made one acquaintance from from the snobby diner bunch. I guess I'm just not New York enough to fit into that group.

On Saturday night I participated in something I'd never heard of, much less done. A phone party line. I can't even recall how I heard about this or got involved, but I do enjoy a good session of phone sex so I thought I'd see what this was all about. I talked with local subs and slaves and a few other Dommes via phone for a couple hours about various BDSM topics. I had a blast and was provided with thought-provoking discussions. Afterward you decide if you want to exchange phone numbers with anyone you talked to and I was lucky enough to be requested by everyone I chatted with! After picture sharing, some of us even made plans to meet the next time I was in the city.

I am not sure if I have mentioned how I feel about what I've dubbed as the "sub-hunt" but I usually take a while to find a sub. I am not sure if it's because I am too picky or because the men are too flaky but once I find a sub I try to give it my all. When our time has come to an end, I go back on the "sub-hunt" sometimes it can take me 6 months or longer to find what I deem an adequate submissive. So far I've been looking for a year, more seriously for the past few months and it is getting daunting. I feel as if I am scrapping the bottom of the barrel with my search. So I mentally told myself that if I hadn't found anyone that I was interested in and vice-versa by November 1st that I am taking an official break for a few months. Just as a breather and to keep my sanity! So, I started looking in NY (because this is also where I found the bf) and I wrote a few people. Some guys were interesting but I got a vibe letting me know they weren't serious. I talked on the phone to a couple but there was no spark. One guy even said after picking up the phone: "Miss L, I have to be honest, I am just looking for sex...and you have a beautiful mouth that I want to do dirty things to me." While I appreciate his candor, I politely declined haha.

I decided to switch up my approach. Fuck how much a guy says he can do for me, fuck his experience, fuck how well he can worship my pussy, and look for someone I might actually get along with. It was with this attitude I wrote someone on Collarme who listed his vanilla interests before his BDSM interests in his profile (brownie point #1), was interested in music and the arts (brownie point #2), was easy on the eyes (brownie point #3) and was located just 8 miles from where I was currently (brownie point #4). I wrote him an honest one-liner and kept looking but to my surprise he was also online that moment and wrote back within minutes. We chatted for a bit in messenger and then he asked if he could call me later that night. Guys rarely ask if they can call me. They always want to fuck around and chat online for ages or text sexual fantasies or email me NSFW pics. I usually have to initiate the phone call idea. All the more reason I was happy to oblige. Once he called and we talked, it was strange...we just fell into the conversation. It was like we had talked before or maybe he was just that easy to talk to. He kept complimenting my voice and my personality (never a bad move) but I kept waiting for the other shoe to drop lol. The conversation was going so well and I enjoyed his personality so much that I slipped in casually:

"So, you wanna meet tomorrow for lunch?" There was a slight pause on his end.

Fuck. I knew it, another illusionist. He just wanted to see how close he could get to his fantasy without actually having to act on it.

"Sure! I'd love to Queen L" he chimed in.

Now I was the one with a pause. I tried not to get too excited because, making plans and following thru on plans are two different things.

I told him to pick a restuarant that wasn't Thai and text me the location tomorrow around noon.

The night dragged on with my insomnia and I tried not to think about tomorrow and if he would really text me or if we would really meet. I was relieved when sleep took me over at 7am.

A little after 12, still no text. I wasn't disappointed. I had prepped myself to expect this. I did some last minute packing, showered and such but when I came back to my phone I had one message with the name of a Columbian resturant and the address, with a time to meet. He had taken to calling me Queen L so I instructed him to write "Queen's Subject" on his inner hand before we met. For me this was just another test to see if the Collarme sub was serious. We met and had lunch. He was everything I thought he'd be from talking. Halfway thru lunch he flashed me his palm, inside in big black sharpie letters were: Queen's Subject. This was very unlike one sub I met who didn't work out who wrote another message on his hand so tiny I needed magnifying glasses to read it. This sub was proud to have my name scrawled across his body.

He offered me back to his place for tea and I didn't have anything but time to kill before the drive back so I accepted. Upon arriving, he showed me around but when I sat on the couch, I told him to sit lower than myself. He sat on the floor, then laid on the floor and that is where he stayed. He begged to kiss my feet and hands, which I let him do. He was so adorable as he lay wrapped around my leg almost drifting to sleep as I petted his head. I really wanted to have him strip and allow me the pleasure of some light spanking, but I didn't want to push too far for a first meeting. We talked and moved from room to room but he still expressed wanting to sit at my feet.

At some point he asked me if I liked the power exchange that comes with being a Domme. "What does it feel like to see me sitting here at your feet?", he asked from my toes.

"I can't describe it in words," I said as I thought about it for a moment.

"You know when you have a craving for a certain food...and maybe you wait all week until Friday to finally get it but then you do? It's like the first taste of the food, when it melts in your mouth and you savor the flavor" I said whole heartedly.

He seemed to like this analogy. But that was accurate for me and if the Collarme sub is my first taste of a long craving, then I think I'll have seconds!

A hard day's night

I've had an interesting past couple of weeks. I've been really trying to get out and meet some new people, subs, switches, CDs, even some Doms.

I decided to send a cutesy CD I've admired online a message, just asking if she'd like to have drinks sometime. To my surprise she agreed to almost immediately. We decided on a local bar but she got lost on the way and I used my super GPS skills to guide her to where I was. We just happened to be near a secluded pasture that has a water park attached. Of course since it was late at night it was closed but that didn't stop us from hopping the fence and enjoying a little after-hours fun in the park. We rode all the slides and even got in the wading area of the pool. It was not what I had expected of the night but was fun all the same.

A little later in the week I met up with a young yet ambitious switch who happens to be a nurse. Nurse sub met up at the bookstore where I was having a discussion with some friends. He was very friendly and pretty normal (which is always a relief). We had almost gotten thru the night with us just chatting as friends when I jokingly chided him for wearing the same color as me. He played along and apologized promising next time to ask for permission to match. My stomach did a little flip flop with excitement. A few days later we went out for dinner together and he was just as friendly. I think he's a nice person but worry how about how much time he has to devote to a demanding Miss such as myself, as he is a bit of a workaholic.

I had a mid-week dinner planned with a sub who sounded spot-on. But, he was promising me the moon and the stars and we'd only been talking for a few weeks online and had yet to meet face to face. I'm a firm believer that it's easy to be anyone you want online, the true test is how you're able to transcend that into reality when you meet someone. But something didn't sit quite right with me about him, so I was anxious to meet him and see for myself what he was like and what do you know...he stood me up! Yes, even a I get stood up. I tried to give him a second chance (even though I was livid) but he basically ignored me. I can only chuckle when I think that it his lost, not mine. This was definitely a case of it sounds too good to be true, it probably is.

Sweet sub heard about me being stood up and offered to hang out with me the following night. I think he was trying cheer me up, which he did. I finally invited him over (for the first time) and he modeled some underwear he had for me. Yes ladies and gents, it's only taken nearly 2 years but I finally got to see him in his undies. He really does have a nice ass for showing off panties. When we met up for drinks last night he expressed to me that he'd be interested in forced oral on another male. While I'm usually not really that into two guys (there's no room for me there!), the thought of his adorable mouth wrapped around a hard cock definitely got me thinking. The more I learn about sweet sub the more I like. It doesn't hurt that he has such a innocent look to him but I know all the naughty things he wants to do!

Now I'm off to New York for a week to see what kind of trouble I can get into in the Big Apple. 

Ask Miss a stupid question, you know you want to...

I wanted to thank everyone who participated in "Ask A Stupid Question Day", and apologize for the lateness. I didn't think you all would really get into it but you did. Some were sexy...some were downright dirty! But, as promised here's a few selected of the questions asked:

Do you sing in the shower?

Sometimes I do sing in the shower, usually to pop songs or show tunes lol.

Have you ever swallowed cum?

Yep, I'm avid believer in swallowing not spitting, unless it's funky spunk...then just walk away, actually run.

What's your worst fashion accessory?

Hmm, I usually don't care what's stylish and make my own statement but even I have to admit that my shirt proclaiming: "For rent by the hour" is a little more forward than I like sometimes haha.

Do you have a favorite sex position?

Definitely! Doggie-style is my favorite. This is even hotter in the mirror over my bed.

Do you believe in aliens?

It'd be silly to think we were the only intelligent life-forms in the solar system.

How many of your submissives have you had feelings for?

Once you get into the swing of things with sessions or collaring someone it is hard to remain completely in role at all times. For me I only choose long-term subs if I have an emotional or extremely sexually-charged connection with them. If that applies, I can't help but start to care about them, even if it is only as a good friend.

What is your ideal Thanksgiving dinner?

This is one of my favorite holidays. Dinner wise: Stuffing, cranberry sauce (from the can!), mac & cheese, green bean casserole, mash potatoes, turkey and ham, pumpkin pie, pineapple slices, spinach, and cheddar biscuits. Mmm, I'm making myself hungry.

If you could do anything to one sub you've mentioned in your blog, who would it be and what would you do?

This is kinda a trick question haha. I haven't introduced all the subs I've met into my blog yet. But I have always enjoyed domesticating a sub for my use. I would love a full day where I worked and my sub just did whatever he was told to do. That could be from massaging my feet, to mopping, to grocery shopping, and then letting me use him as a footstool, all while wearing whatever I have decided will make him appealing to me. I find it completely sexy when a submissive does what he's asked and with a very genuine "Yes Ma'am" in response.

Do you believe the moon landing was a hoax?

I've often wondered because of its convenient timing and some of the facts not adding up. Our government hiding things or falsifying events for the general public is nothing new.

As a Mistress, do you ever get tired of being in charge?

Absolutely not. I love making decisions in life or others lives, even it's just to tell the other person that they must make a decision. My creativeness is what keeps me from getting board with BDSM.

What's one guilty pleasure of yours (non-sexual)?

It's gotta be reality television. I can really get sucked into their carnival-esque lives sometimes!

Do you ever hurt your hand when you're spanking someone?

Yes. Haha, sometimes I wonder who's really getting the inflicting punishment.

I like your blog when it's sexy, why did you do this dumb question thing?

Just to annoy you haha but seriously, there'll be more sexy things this week so sit tight.