I dare you

I knew what he wanted but I wouldn't give it to him.

He carefully placed his hand under my blanket now, rubbing just the underside of my cheeks as I lay face down. I lazily but rhythmically stroked his bare cock with my left hand, making sure to take care when nearing the head---his favorite spot.

His hands grew warmer as he tried to spread me apart ever so lightly but I wouldn't give.

He kissed the side of my face and my hair...an almost pleading in their meaning.

I laid perfectly still except for the stroking.

I felt his leg intertwine between mine and he nudged my foot with his. I could feel him wriggling his fingers just on the edge of my womanhood.

I was definitely getting wet now but I still would not open my legs for him.

Why am I so willing to submit to my vanilla lovers? Is it because I want to see just how animalistic they can get when they can have what they want? Is it because I want them to not be afraid to have their way with me? Or is it because every lady likes to be man-handled every now and then and taking control is much harder sometimes than relinquishing it?

His fingers grew impatient and he started kneading my ass and patting it, as if he wanted to spank me but didn't trust himself to do so without my usual permission and begging. He traced the line in the middle of my ass then danced over each cheek with his fingertips.

I knew what he wanted. His cock starting oozing a small bit of pre-come into my hand.

He reached up from my ass and began playing with the side of my exposed breasts. If I was an engine he wanted to warm me up before taking the drive.

I kept stoking his cock.

"Come on," I thought. "Take me!" I said in my head.

His cock throbbed in my hand.

I knew he'd never be as aggressive as I wanted him to be because he loved me.

I stopped stroking.

He slowly edged back down to my ass taking time to survey my reaction.

I yawned, I stretched, I rolled over and smiled at him and then I got up and walked out of the room.

I knew what he wanted but I wouldn't give it to him the way he wanted because I loved him.
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Rant: Big girls don't cry

I have a right to be choosy.

I can choose who kneels for me...
who kisses my heels...
who worships my body...
and more importantly who serves me.

Just because I'm fat doesn't mean I don't get to be choosy.

I've mentioned before that I have a strict age preference for the men I want to serve me. For some reason this gets overlooked on a daily basis. I am looking for someone who can adequately serve me and whom is also atheistically pleasing to me. The age restriction I have enforced seems to be the average limit of when I stop thinking men above that age are attractive. Again this just my preference. Not to mention men above this age don't really have much in common with me. And yes there are exceptions to every rule but I'm speaking in a manner of generally this is what I want.

Recently on Collarme I told a sniveling 52 year old man-child that he was well above my age limit and he got snarky, down right rude if I'm putting it plainly:

"You're lucky a man of my submissive stature even wrote you. Plus you're fat, you should be happy that I'm even offering my service."

I've been called fat, chunky, round, pudgy and everything in between before. It wasn't the "F" word that got me pissed. It was his naive assumption that because I am plus size, I don't have many options. His idea that I should be grateful for the few scraps of affection I do get from any male gendered individuals because I am after all grotesque.

I encountered this often when I was dating vanilla men as well. No one should be considered "lucky" to have someone of the opposite sex acknowledge them. No one is above anyone else.

In case it needs to be said directly: Fat girls aren't desperate. Despite common misconception.

We just aren't.

I never write about my size because it's not a hindrance for me but it seems to be a hindrance for other people and honestly, that's their problem not mine.

I just wanted to let my lovely readers see why some men just aren't submissive material---or for that matter getting-to-know-them material.

Now, I will take my fat ass to bed =)
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Dude looks like a lady

Congressman: I missed you.

Miss L: You only think you did.

CM: No, really I did.

ML: Prove it.

CM: Ha, you love having me at your mercy don't you?

ML: I have to admit it does get me a bit hot. Even just thinking about it gets me tingly.

CM: Oh...is that because you know to the outside world I would be a far cry from being considered submissive?

ML: Yes. And  I know behind closed doors I can dress you up like the shameless sissy you are and make you beg for me.

CM: *Blush* Yes Miss L. I would beg for anything from you.

ML: Good. Prove it. Beg to dress up in your pretty dress for me. Get on voice chat, I want to hear you whimper for it.

CM: Yes Miss L

He proceeded to get on voice chat and beg to wear the dress I liked to see his legs in. He was breathy, and spoke carefully. When I commanded a whimper he did so without hesitation. Hearing him moan and whimper made me want to dominate him even more.

ML: You're such a good boy for me sometimes.

CM: Haha I try to be Miss L. I want to be your good boy and yours only. Would you like for me to put on the dress now?

ML: Yes, turn on your cam and strip for me, then I want you to open the curtains in the room and put on the dress.

CM: The curtains? My neighbors can see in from this side of the building.

ML: ...Your point being?

CM: Yes Miss L, I will do as I am told.

With his webcam on he did exactly as I instructed. He took the slowest steps possible to the window and opened the curtains a bit.

ML: Congress boy, I want to see those curtains open wider. Just the way you were spread for me last time we were together.

He came back to the camera with a bit more red on his cheeks and a small smirk on his lips but opened them wider. I watched as he left the room and returned with his dress. He put on the stockings, his dress, a very nice wig and then he pranced over to the camera. It was quite sexy to watch the transformation.

CM: How does this look? Does Miss L approve?

ML: Turn around

He spun around causing his dress ruffles to bounce a bit.

ML: You look delightful! Now I want to see my good by act naughty.

He covered his mouth with his hand (like a proper lady), laughed and then curtseyed.

CM: Whatever you wish my Mistress
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The twilight zone

After my trip to London I feel a bit empty. Aside from my personal issues while there my scene experience was great...too great in fact. It's made me feel as if the scene in this area is not where I belong.

When I was overseas it was like a parallel universe where plus size dominant women were in high demand but low supply. My American accent was charming and an instant conversation starter and any British accents were added bonus points for me. I got to attend three fetish events in the week that I was there and while I didn't get to know "everyone" I felt as if the crowd was much more welcoming than in the Metro DC area, which is a shame...because this is where I live.

I also got to meet with five potential submissives, only one of who I had actually chatted with online. The previous guys all backed out in one form or another---so I guess they have that in common with the American men as well. But the gents I did meet while there were a total delight and needed little to no coaching on my part to be submissive toward me. It was amusing leading one guy around by his belt buckle in the busy streets of London as we did get a few odd looks haha.

I know that I don't go out in the Metro DC scene anymore because it is a bit of a headache with the social politics (two groups are vying for attention and hold their festives on the same night every month), the influx of Pro Dommes at every event trying to drum up business, and the general clique feel of things. It seems to be all in "who you know" and "not what you like" in this area.

I've been dreading admitting this because I'm not sure if it was a mix of the travel bug (i.e. new place = blinders, foreign country, etc) or if it really is as black and white as it appears from my end. I've been back two months now and still, like a steady, annoying, drip from a leaky ceiling the men contacting me here are not within my criteria. The fact that many of them don't take the time to read a few simple words on a profile that states what I'm looking for in bullet format really irks the shit out of me! I find myself more angry at the fact that they blatantly ignore my wishes to write me promising how devotedly submissive they are and how well they follow instructions than the actual messages themselves.

*Sigh*  So the question remains, "Where are all the good male DC submissives?"
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Go tweet yourself

Okay, it's official...I've joined the masses.

Follow me over on Twitter
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Or click the link in the sidebar

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Birthday wishes (Part 2)

I had invited quiet sub, I knew he was coming...I just wasn't prepared for it. We had some good sessions but then things just sort of dissolved with our work schedules and my lack of initiative and the times we had seen each other since then had been in vanilla settings.

So while prepping drinks in the kitchen, when I caught a glimpse of a cute, skinny, white boy with long hair coming thru my front door, it didn't dawn on me that it was quiet sub...even though he had told me he had grown his hair out.

There's no other way to say it: He looked completely and utterly fuckable!

Instantly I was happy I had asked him earlier in the week to let me give him some of my birthday spankings, to which he had happily agreed stating, "Whatever the birthday girl wants."

If there's one thing I miss about hanging out with quiet sub it's that he likes to have a good time. And by good time, I mean that we can drink together and get a little wild. He greeted me with a hug and I greeted him with a drink. He's much more relaxed when he drinks and I wanted him to be all relaxed and ready to receive my spankings.

We mingled at the party but kept stealing moments in the corner of random body gropings, intense looks, and bedroom eyes.

I pulled my other sub aside and said, "I want to give you my spankings with quiet sub, is that okay?"

"Of course! If that's what you want Miss L," he responded smiling.

I slunk over to quiet sub and pressed him up against my hallway wall lightly, carefully placing my body just close enough to make him feel my body heat. I could feel his heart beating against my breasts and his breath was hot with liquor.

"Are you still okay with me giving you spankings with my other sub?" I asked half expecting him to veto the idea at the last chance.

He thought for a brief moment and said smiling, "Yes, it's fine, as long as you're still doing the spanking."

Shortly thereafter I told the other sub to go to bed room and wait for me there and then I told quiet sub the same minutes later, staggering their entrances.

I stayed back in the midst of the party a few minutes more (just to make them wait) and then I walked back to my bedroom, opening the door to each of them standing at attention. I locked the door swiftly behind me, the alcohol coursing thru me had shifted my aggressive gear even higher than usual. My mind raced with all the things I could do with not one but two willing submissives. 

But I needed to focus on the task at hand.

"So are you two ready for your spankings?" I asked mischievously grinning slyly.

"Yes Miss L" both said aloud.

I directed them to remove their pants and to get on their hands and knees facing away from me.

If I wasn't excited before, this moment was when it hit me: Two adorable subbie boys were waiting to be spanked by me, bottoms in the air just screaming be touched. I had forgotten how much I enjoyed quiet sub's perfectly round cheeks.

I made the other sub look as well to confirm that it was a great ass.

"You're right Miss L, he does have a great ass," he said to me directly. I nodded and pushed him back down with a smile. Objectifying men the way they sometimes do to women makes me smile if only for the mere fun in turning the tables.

I grabbed Bianaca, couldn't leave her out of the festivities, and paddled the other sub's bottom for a few slaps. He moaned with his head down. Then I moved to quiet sub and did the same. They both arched their backs and pushed their asses closer to me, wanting more. I switched to my hands taking turns, spanking one while teasing the others' balls. They moaned and groaned in pleasure. Inside the bedroom it sounded like a full on mini-orgy.

I couldn't let my other vanilla guests hear what was going on so I made quiet sub kneel on his knees and face me while the other submissive remained on all fours.

"You are so fucking hot. Do you miss me spanking you?" I asked quiet sub, grabbing a handful of his newly long hair forcing him to look up at me.

"Yes Miss L I do," he said in shallow breaths.

I reached down to feel his growing cock and then I spanked the other sub who was on my left side.

I squeezed quiet sub's nipples and he let out a tiny noise that sounded like a deflating balloon.

"Do you want to kiss me?" I asked him.

He nodded and I grabbed his hair again and planted my luscious lips to his. He tasted like the tequila we had taken a shot of earlier. He was quick to give me his tongue and we made out briefly while I pinched and grabbed the other sub's ass with my free hand. There's an intensity between quiet sub and I sometimes, a carnal-ness that takes over when we focus on each other but I didn't want to leave my other sub out.

"Spank him!" I commanded quiet sub pointing to the sub's bottom.

He lifted his hand back and swatted at his bottom landing a firm but not heavy smack.

I could tell the spankee was enjoying this as I knew he enjoyed being spanked also by men with his bi-curious tendencies.

Throughout the night I played a little more in bed with the other submissive, I teased him endlessly and promised he could orgasm the following day with a dildo in his ass (which he did) and he thanked me for letting him have the honor of sharing my bed.

Quiet sub and I played a bit more the next morning as well and I can honestly say with two blowjobs, four spankings, being fingered, having my nipples sucked, watching someone orgasm to my pictures, and fucking a sub with a dildo, this was one of the best birthday I've had in ages.

How can I possibly top this next year?!
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In the meantime...Birthday wishes (Part 1)

Did I tell you the one about my birthday....?

Birthdays and spankings go together like lace and leather, so it should be no surprise that it was the main focus of my birthday wishes this year.

In true Mistress L fashion, I threw a birthday party with lots of friends and even more alcohol! But the day started off much unlike other birthdays.

"This is going to be bare bottomed," the sub said almost under his breath as if he too were in shock that I was offering my ass for spankings.

I had told him in the weeks leading up to my birthday that he could give me my birthday spankings (one for each year) and from the dancing light in his eyes I knew he had been looking forward to this. Me on the other hand, I had been slightly dreading it, perhaps dreading is too strong a word, but I was definitely cautious of it.

This sub considered himself a switch. Not only that, he was a switch with a focused interest on spanking specifically. I had a preview of his spanking style before and let's just say, wow! It's a small part of what made me enjoy dominating him even more, the knowledge that he had a dominate side hidden under all that submissive goodness. 

So when I arrived there was the bit of business about my spankings to be taken care of. He had an arsenal of his favorite toys laid out menacingly for me to see beforehand:

1 wooden spoon
1 acrylic cane
1 leather paddle
1 acrylic paddle with holes
1 ping pong paddle

and of course, his bare hands.

So when he said, "This is going to be bare bottomed," I dutifully removed my panties bending over the bed to raise my ass higher for my treasured birthday spankings.

He rubbed my bottom carefully in small circles, which felt nice but then started with a surprise smack to my right cheek.

"One," I said muffled into the bedsheets, gripping them tightly in my hands. Yes. I had foolishly agreed to counting out my own spankings!

He gave me about 10 more with his hands, a few with the spoon and then switched to that devil cane.

"Sixteen, seventeen, eighteen," I counted between clenched teeth.

It wasn't that he was being overly aggressive, it's just that I am not a pain slut, not to mention me and canes (of acrylic variety specifically) have a bad history. I'll have to tell you readers that story sometime---but I still have PTSD from it so it might be a while haha.

I let him know that it was too hard and he rubbed me gently before moving on to the remainder of his toys. I couldn't honestly tell you what was next as mentally I subdued myself to take the rest (yes, even I can slip into subspace when needed I suppose) and took my spankings like a good girl.

He stood there proud of his work and I pulled up my panties, shaking my head causing the pig-tails I'd worn that day to lightly brush my ears.

"Revenge is going to be so sweet," I teased.

And throughout the day that's all I could think about, giving him his revenge spankings, that is until quiet sub walked into my party...
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Life happens

Well I arrived in the UK last weekend and have left this weekend. This was much shorter than the couple months I planned to visit. I didn't get to see much of the city but an extreme family emergency has called me back and it was imminent that I return. Perhaps I will return again at a later time.

I apologize in advance for any future slack in my blogging, but don't worry I'm sure I'll be back full force once things settle down.
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Rant: Polyamory is not a bad word

Listen up men of the interwebs...swingers ≠ polyamorous 

I have a few profiles floating around online and all of them mention my being in an open relationship. Despite my stating its variance to swinging the young (and sometimes much too old), dense men writing me don't seem to understand the distinct differences.

So it is for that reason I think it's imperative I explain it as I see it.

This is a non-monogamous sexual act. Some people call it 'wife swapping' or 'partner swapping' despite the sexist connotation of it. A couple decides to and is aware of sexual activity with other people. Typically the couple shares these sexual excursions together but not always. Each partner always knows and consents to the sexual activity outside of the relationship. Their sexual acts are usually limited to that of conventional nature and is often only practiced at certain events catered to swinging, swinging clubs, etc. Within this there are two kinds of swapping "full swapping" (full penetrative sex), and "soft swapping" (oral sex). As you may notice at the core of swinging is good ol' fashion sex.

The very name of this non-monogamous act explains what it means. It is comprised of the Greek words ultimately meaning "many loves". This is also another form of ethical non-monogamy. All partners are aware of outside relationships, however they don't necessarily participate as a couple and sometimes not even both participate. Sex is not the main objective of this type of relationship, experiencing multiple and diverse relationships and all they entail is. The true spirit in being in more than one relationship at a time.

The only commonalities that these share is that they are both consensual, honest, non-monogamous types of relationships. One revolves mainly around sex and the other revolves around building a relationship with an additional person(s).

I can see why the men writing me want me be into swinging. It's much more appealing on the surface and if you're looking for a quick roll in the hay, that's the fastest way to get there but that's not what me and the bf are practicing. But you can't lump us all together just because we do things in an unconventional manner. That doesn't mean we don't crave respect, tolerance, and someone who gives a damn to learn the difference.

I honestly think that both types have their respective pros and cons and even have participated in swinging in the past---nevertheless for now, I am searching for something deeper than 8 inches haha.
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I say tomato...

In the past I've said that online based domination and D/s relationships were not my cup of tea. However with my trip looming on the horizon communicating via online thru emails, web cam, and instant messaging is the only feasible way to get to know anyone.

In addition to a few contacts I already had I've began talking to an array of interesting gentlemen; 4 submissives, and two switches.

I hate to be so rashly observant but in my contacts with the British men has been much more pleasant than with the guys here. They are polite, courteous, witty, and just all around a pleasure to chat with. Even when sending the inappropriate penis picture to me the sender politely apologized for his rudeness haha. That's not to say there aren't any guys here who possess those exact characteristics it's just I haven't been experiencing that online.

It has been an interesting way to flex my creative ability in thinking of ways to show my domination while I'm 3,600 miles away. Explicitly explaining the tease and tantalization that I want to put them thru, sharing naughty pictures, and just plainly getting to know them has seemed to work well thus far. 

I'm hoping that they will live up to their online identities and by live up to I mean follow thru on our loose plans to meet up. I've promised myself that I am going to make more of an effort to take part in the local scene when I get that than I do here. I'm going in with an open mind and a desire to explore possibilities.
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I'm too sexy for this blog

I like to think I don't need validation that my blog is sexy and rather kick-ass but every girl likes a little attention now and then.

So whether it's me or another sexy blogger you want to nominate, it doesn't matter...just get on over to Between My Sheets to cast your vote for the Sexiest Bloggers of 2011. You only get one vote so make it count! *wink* Nomination closes on August 31 so tick tock! Be sure to read all the instructions before nominating.

Also there are prizes to be given just for nominating and I know you all like free goodies!

They include:
This year I limited myself to just three nominations and it was so tough. But, I'll be voting for Ms. Dee over at Curvaceous Dee, ol' Riff Dog for his lovely Ashley & Me tales (he better post soon to qualify!), and my new favorite read full of uniqueness Shape Shifter at Alternative Mindsets

Good luck everyone!
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Flirting: A fine art

I've often said that I believe flirting should be treated as a fine art. It is not something one can wander into with no experience, no clear objective, and certainly no quips on hand. For me whenI am flirted with it either goes into one of two categories: 1) Nice try bum. Next! or 2) Well what do we have here? Those are my only two mental reactions. One of them will lead to an equally flirtatious response from me the other...well...let's not strive for the other.

I learned at a very young age that flirting was a gateway action. Get that perfected and the possibilities were endless. I've been known to give men who may otherwise not have captured my attention a second look-over solely because I was attracted to their flirting technique.

And I'm sure anyone who has swapped racy emails, naughty pics, or even spent a few nights sexting knows that the build up a good flirting does for any actual sexual acts makes it all the more better.

I know not every guy is versed in the way of flirting, so I'm going to give you lacking men some quick tips to remember:

When You Least Expect It
Flirting can happen almost anywhere, so always bring your A game...or at least a solid B-. 

Timing Is Everything
Notice I said flirting can happen, almost anywhere, not everywhere. This means no flirting at funerals, just after a woman has left the bathroom (this always feels creepy), at interviews, religious ceremonies, while she's crying on your shoulder after a break-up, after a car accident, and anywhere else where there is a larger issue for your cosmic meeting. I personally know these are horrid locations because someone has tried to flirt with me at each one.

Don't Babble
If you lack any clever lines, just stick with the facts and tell her a little about yourself and your interests.

No Arm Waving Necessary
A little subtlety goes a long way. You don't need to be a complete ass to get a girl's attention. A nod, wink, cocked smile, or even shy glance could be the in you need. But choose only one of these and if it's a wink, only one wink, otherwise it appears as if you have tourettes or you think she is for rent for the night. 

Hands Off!
No touching unless invited to do so. I know many women feel violated when someone, especially a man, invades their personal space. She will give you clues if it's okay to make contact with her, such as her touching you first, her moving closer than necessary, shifting her weight in your direction, etc. When you get the signal be sure to touch her appropriately...this isn't the time for nipple tweaking.

Listen Carefully
Once you've got a woman's attention. Stay engaged and pay attention. If you are interested in something she says, ask her for more details. It's been proven that one of the top five traits the average woman wants in a partner is for them to be a good listener.

It's All In Your Head
Flirting is an attitude. If you're confident in your actions she be will too. Nothing says "You want me" like "I KNOW you want me."

Now get out there and sharpen those flirting skills fellas...and ladies, don't give them such a hard time if they stumble a little...you gotta kneel before you can beg.
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Exactly what the doctor ordered

Anyone who lives in this area knows that underestimating traffic can mean the difference between making your movie date slightly late or having to reschedule for the next week. I reminded myself this when nurse sub showed up to my house a little over two hours past our meeting time this week. He had informed me that he was going to be running late, I just wasn't aware how much. Once he arrived I realized that he had been sitting in a hot car for over an hour just to see me on his day off...I could cut him some slack.

I mentally reorganized the things I had awaiting him and we chatted for a few minutes before I curbed the small talk and told him while looking over a small list, "I've got some chores for you to do for me today."

He happily began working and I felt better about asking him to come over that day to pamper me. First I made him put the dishes away. I didn't tell him where anything went and told him to find where most things went on his own. I wanted to see if he was going to nag me about their placement but he's rather sharp and did fine without my micro-managing.

He finished that in a snap and then I said, "Now go to the bedroom, remove your clothing down to your underwear, put on the collar that is on the bed and return to me for your next task."

I was busy finishing up some work of my own on the computer when nurse sub returned exactly as commanded. I had told him previously to wear "cute" underwear and it seems he had chosen well as he knelt before me in the collar and an eye catching, bright, modern pair of briefs.

I gave him his next tasks with more detailed instructions: dusting, vacuuming, and tidying up.

He again completed these without much assistance and with a smile on his face. I liked looking over from my work only to see him dusting away in tight undies and a collar.

When all those were done he came and knelt again at my feet. It was then I gave him step-by-step instruction on painting my toenails. When I finished I was surprised that he picked it up so quickly and did a more than decent job on his first try. Usually submissives (no matter how good their intentions) get a little sloppy with the nail polish and instead of toes that look steadily painted you'd swear a blind man had a try with the tiny bottle and brush.

Once my toes finished drying I wanted to have my feet massaged. I know that nurse sub loves feet and I love having my feet touched. I imagined all this contact with my feet was as pleasing to him as it was me and it always escapes me that he previously took massage classes until he actually begins massaging.

He held my feet delicately and ran his hands along my soles, taking care to knead at the right spots. He even wedged his fingers in between my toes making sure every spot on my foot had been touched in one way or another.

"Does that feel good Miss?" he asked mid massage but words escaped me and I just nodded as I relaxed on my pile of pillows.

Next I wanted to feel his hands on my body and I removed my top and had him unclasp my bra before he began oiling me up. Each moment he continued to massage my back I sank a little further into the bed. Saying that nurse sub has magic hands doesn't do him justice.

If you're noticing a lack of relaying in nurse sub's dialogue it's because he's rather quiet and doesn't speak unless spoken to generally when in sub mode (where ever did he pick up this little gem). Not to mention he is dedicated and focused once he goes about doing a task. I find him to be one of few submissives who genuinely enjoys submitting only because it makes the dominant happy. He is happy to cater to whims with nothing in return if he feels the dominant is getting exactly what they need; a true service submissive at heart.

But I can't help admitting after all the body massaging I was feeling a bit frisky. So, I put my bra back on slowly and then made him lay a blanket down on the floor. 

"Lay down on the ground," I instructed pointing to the ground. He did as he was told but went to lay on his stomach before I corrected him.

"Close your eyes," I ordered once he flipped over on his back.

I lowered myself down onto his face supporting my weight on my hands at first. I could feel him blow an exhale of hot air between my legs. I looked under myself to be sure I was situated as I wanted to be and then I begin to rub my lady parts on his face.

I could feel him wriggling under me and poking his tongue out thru my panties. I ground down a bit more on him. Occasionally I would check on him but he seemed fine as he stretched and craned his neck to try to get more of "me" on his face. At one point I sat up with his head between my legs and under my thighs, his forehead just peeking out and  I put the majority of my weight down on just his head. I could feel him using his mouth to try to satisfy me as waves of hot air moved between my legs whenever he wasn't suckling on the outline of my lips thru my panties. His eagerness and flicks of sensual stimulation were arousing and I began to rock my weight back and forth as I smothered him under me. It was queening at it's finest.

After a bit I stood up from him, my pussy noticeably wetter than when I first sat down and I looked at him.

He sat there, eyes closed, with the biggest smile on his face. He looked completely and utterly content. I've never seen a gentleman look as if a miracle had happened in between my legs but nurse sub could hardly sit up as he thanked me for allowing him the experience. His happiness made me smile as I couldn't help but think of the joy my womanhood had brought him that was only a small taste of it.

I'd say in this case I prescribed exactly what nurse sub needed.
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59 days never felt so long

I have mentioned to a few of you individually but I am making it officially known that I will be traveling overseas at the end of the summer thanks to my very best friend/brother/kinkster-in-training/partner in hilarious crime. 

I am ecstatic!

It has been far too long since I have traveled to Europe for an extended period and I plan to make the most of it as this time I will be a full-fledged adult.  <---Can we say trouble?

Like any good Mistress I have already begun the preparations for meeting little British subbie boys and filling in a mostly kinky (and some vanilla) social calendar. I'd prefer not to be completely out of the loop once I arrive. 

I must admit a huge turn on for me has always been the accents of foreigners alike, but the English accent stirs something deep within. Anytime I imagine a proper speaking submissive toy at my feet I get goosebumps.

I'll be hitting a few of the touristy spots as well but it's really the hidden gems of the city I'm after.

I imagine the city will need quite a rest when I am done with it and I will share all the juicy details with you dear readers!
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Is that a banana in your pocket...

..Or are you just happy to see me?

I love it when the guys I chat with online send me requested sweet nothings.

It reads: Miss L <3 All for You

There's nothing quite like seeing your name written on a nice hard cock, oozing with a warm load. Gives me fuzzies inside. I must be sure to return his request as well.
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30 Days of Kink (Pt. 5)

Day 25: How open are you about your kinks?
I'm relatively open about who I am and what I do in general. I don't hide my kink but I don't advertise it either. I make it a point to not be "ashamed" of it. For me it's a natural part of my sexuality. I find vanilla couples make jokes about their sex life openly and when the opportunity arises if I want to make a kink-sex joke I do with no regrets. Many of my friends know that I am kinky and if they don't, they most likely wouldn't be surprised if they found out. As for family, I don't discuss my sex life at all with them...vanilla or otherwise, but again if they openly asked, I would openly answer.

Day 26: What’s your opinion on online BDSM play?
In an entry a while back I shared a story about a couple that has been involved with BDSM solely thru web for nearly 10 years. For me, that would never cut it. I don't mind online BDSM play if it's to tie me over in between real time meets, or before I meet someone. However, online play as only option? I would never do that. For me BDSM weighs heavily on my senses. I love the smell of leather, the whimper of a submissive tied up, the feel of someone's hair as I grab it, the taste of salty skin when I sink my teeth into ones thigh...I'm sure online BDSM play works for some, just not for me. 

Day 27: Do your non-kink interests ever find their way into your kinky activities? If so, how?
This is something I am ever aware of since I am in a relationship with a vanilla person. I am naturally dominant so that I cannot suppress---I don't even try anymore haha but my actions I try to take into consideration. I sometimes playfully bite or spank my vanilla partner. I like these things but I know that they are tied to BDSM for me, when I have a kinky partner, these are things that I do at my will and with much more force. So when I exhibit these actions with my bf I have to be careful not to be too forceful.

Day 28: How do you dress for kink/BDSM play?  What significance does your attire have to you?
I don't have a specific way of dressing. I usually dress however I feel. I love breaking the stereotype of dominant woman in leather and high heels by wearing a low-cut shirt and jeans and being extra dominant. My attire doesn't really hold much significance for my BDSM play unless I'm going out to a fetish club or themed play party.

Day 29: Do you have a BDSM title (e.g. mistress, master, slut, pig, whore, princess, goddess, ma’am, sir)?  What is your opinion of the use of titles in general?
I usually go by Mistress/Miss L and that's how I introduce myself. I've found the longer a submissive goes without calling me by my first name the more control I feel. I give my submissives pet names as well sometimes or if they have a nickname that people normally call them by such as "Bill" for "William" I always refer to them as their full name (William), to show that I am not in the same category as others. I think titles can be fun and also triggers. For me it helps solidify statuses.  

Day 30: Whatever BDSM/kink related thing you want to write about. 
I'll share a kinky joke I heard one time: A man and a woman are sitting next to each other at a bar getting drunk. The man turns to the woman and asks her why she's so down.

"My husband just left me. He said I'm too kinky in bed," she said.

"What a coincidence! My wife just left me," said the man. "She told me that I was too kinky for her, too!"

The two talk a little while longer, and finding that they have so much in common they decide to go back to the woman's house to have kinky sex. When they get to the woman's house she turns to the man and says, "Give me ten minutes, I want to slip into something more comfortable."

She goes into the bathroom and changes into a full leather dominatrix outfit. However, as she is coming out of her bathroom, the man is putting on his coat and walking out the door.

"What happened?" she said. "I thought you wanted to have kinky sex?"

He looks at her and says, "Well, I just screwed your dog and shit in your purse. I'm done."

My 30 Days of Kink are done but that doesn't mean you can't do your own. Enjoy the questions here!
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30 Days of Kink (Pt. 4)

Day 18: Any kinky/BDSM pet peeves?
My main peeve is when people take themselves too seriously in my opinion. A shining example of that is the slahes of Y/your, Dom/me, etc and the self capitalization and de-capitalization of things such as My, Her, Him, Dominant, etc. It just makes me think they are trying too hard or being really anal.

Day 19: Any unexpected ways kink has improved your life? 
Kink has made me less judgmental. I was fairly open-minded before but I feel now I've taken that to another level. I try not to look down on someone's kink if I don't understand it. Instead I try to learn about it as a concept and if I don't want to then I don't let what they do bother me. 

Day 20:  Talk about something within kink/bdsm that you’re curious about/don’t understand.
Haha I swear I don't read these questions before I sit down and answer them. Hmm, something I don't understand is toilet or scat play. It's messy, it has an odor, and it seems generally unsanitary...how can that be arousing for anyone--did I mention it's the stuff that someone else's own body doesn't want?  

Day 21: Favorite BDSM related book (fiction or non-fiction)
Of all the books I've read and own I find "Erotic Slavehood" by Miss Christina Abernathy to have an array of information. It's a great training manual and general book to help subs/slaves alike hone in on their submissive natures and fine tune their skills. If you are curious about whether or not you are submissive, this would be a good book to see what that might entail. I'm particularly fond of the things she believes a good D/s relationship should include. 

Day 22: What do you think is important in keeping a BDSM relationship healthy?  How does it differ from a vanilla relationship?
I feel as if trust (and truthfulness) is even more important in a BDSM relationship than in a vanilla one. That's not to say it's okay to lie in a vanilla relationship. I just feel that with BDSM it takes a lot of trust to let your guard down enough to do or have things done to you personally. There's lots of people who trust me but would they agree to have me tie them up and have my way with them? That's debatable.  

Day 23: Since you first developed an interest in kink, have your interests/perspectives changed? How so?
Certainly! I came into BDSM not knowing what to expect but as with many people keeping a mental tally of all the things I wasn't into and didn't want to try. As time went on I noticed that not only had I tried some of those things....I also enjoyed them! I've made it a point to not say I'll never try something, instead I say I'm not interested in trying that "right now" because who knows how I'll feel in a year or five?

Day 24: What qualities do you look for in a partner?
I'm assuming this meant for a kinky partner.  If that is the case I find that my most successful partners have been those that are as patient with me as I am with them, open-minded but not mindless, devoted, and most of all friendly. If I feel like I am developing a friendship with my submissive I begin to feel as if our possibilities for new things are endless.

My 30 days are almost over but if you want to start your own, check it out here, it's fun!
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30 Days of Kink (Pt. 3)

Day 12: Tell us about a humorous BDSM/kink experience you’ve had.  If you haven’t had one, talk about aspects of kink/BDSM you find funny.
One of the first play parties I attended was a highly private event. It was by invite only and I wanted to impress everyone there (especially the hostess). I was particularly excited about this party because it was a "Masquerade" type of party, which appeals to my inner costume fetish. I had a submissive boy toy who was known for his "skills downtown". For me this is a curiosity because I am very strict in how I receive that kind of pleasure...the catch is I am highly ticklish in my vagina if it's not done with brain surgeon precision. So, while at the party to show off (hey, I was young and wanted to appear in control) I asked him to live up to his reputation. Literally five seconds after he began I felt this swell of laughter bubble up inside me. I tried to contain it but once I get started I can't stop. In the middle of this "classy" event with half the people in mask who were twice my age I burst into uncontrollable laughter. I couldn't stop for a good five minutes. Some people in the area still talk about that night.

Day 13: Explain as best you can what the appeal of kink/BDSM is to you?  Why are you drawn to what you’re drawn to?
For me the appeal lies in how direct and natural it is. We feel these desires, we want these sensations, we crave our fetishes...it's our nature. The appeal is the freedom it presents in its second-natureness. If we are honest with ourselves and we allow ourselves to just "be" we truly understand what's at our core. 

Day 14: How would you say real life BDSM/kink varies from fantasy BDSM/kink?
I see this all the time...submissive men who come to me and either a) they're afraid to meet me in a public setting because they think I will come in full latex and six inch heels or b) they are upset when they do meet me in private and I'm not wearing full latex and six inch heels. It's a no win situation sometimes with the people who are wrapped up in their own fantasies. I'm not a Pro-Domme, this a lifestyle not my life. In my opinion anytime you actually take part in a BDSM activity it stops being a fantasy and starts being a reality. I think kinky participants are usually undetectable vanillas in most settings.

Day 15: Post a BDSM/kink activity you’re curious about and would like to try.
I've been interested in the usage of a vacuum bed. This is a device where a person is placed in a latex envelope and then all of the air is removed creating an outline of said person, leaving only a small space for an air tube. This device can't be used alone and just screams EROTIC!

Day 16: What are the most difficult aspects of having a sexuality that involves kink or BDSM for you personally?
There's two things: One, is that I feel more sexually satisfied when kink is involved. I can be sexually satisfied...the keyword is I am more satisfied with it. For that I feel it's unfair to not alert my vanilla sexual partners that I am interested in kink. The other thing that's difficult for me is the general populace thinks what I enjoy is "taboo". I strongly believe that what someone chooses to do in the privacy of their bedroom is their business. Period. Who are we to judge?

Day 17: What misconception about kinky people would you most like to clear up?
We are not freaks and not all of us have underlying emotional issues that make us "damaged". Contrary to popular belief.

Day 18: Any kinky/BDSM pet peeves?  If so, what are they?
Most of peeves have to do with the BDSM community. It's just people being people but usually we are the ones with the power to taint things. Sometimes I feel the people within the scene make BDSM more complicated and/or unappealing than it needs to be.

And if you'd like to complete the 30 Days of Kink as well you can participate by getting the info here
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30 Days of Kink (Pt. 2)

Day 5. What was your first kinky sexual experience?
Hmm...I would have to say it back in my teens. My senior year of high school I had interesting companionship with an older man. He was the first person I tied up. We were at his place when I teased him saying that he had been naughty (I can't remember why now) but it ended with me tying him with his own tie to a chair and essentially teasing him for a bit.

Day 6. Describe your weirdest/most interesting sexual fantasy. 
I have a few things I want to try that I'd consider weird but my most recent one has been on human doll play. I find it highly erotic to think about completely controlling someone for a day from morning to night. What appeals to me even further is that I want a human doll who can only say a few phrases all day (like the dolls with pull strings) and that essentially whatever I make them do goes. I saw a special about men and love dolls...which are great if you're into that but I think the actual human doll play pushes that up to another level. 

Day 7. What's your favorite toy? 
My favorite toy I no longer have, I've yet to replace it. But it use to be my pair of vampire gloves. They are gloves that have short, tiny spikes on the palm of them. The sensation play with these are amazing! Not to mention you can create a light prick or really give your partner something to yell about if you apply more pressure.

Day 8. Post a kinky image you find erotic.

This image really speaks to me as I often parade around the house bottomless. And when I do have a submissive doing things for me, I like to grope, fondle, and just generally let it be known that their body belongs to me when in my presence.

Day 9. Post a kink related song or music image you enjoy.
I often can be found blasting Lady Gaga's song "I Like It Rough", I love the lines:

"I'm shiny and I know it
Don't know why you want to blow it
Need a man who likes it rough
Likes it rough, likes it rough"

Even though the song isn't about anything kink, I found those lyrics to fit when I need them.

Day 10. What are your hard limits? 
Mine are the usual, no water sports, scat, children, blood, infidelity. Those things I cannot compromise on.

Day 11. What are your views on the ethics of kink?
For me I believe as long as things are safe, sane, and consensual and no one is getting emotionally or mentally scarred then who am I to judge? BDSM relationships and interests are no different than vanilla relationships and interests--they are complicated and unique in their own right. If it works for the individual(s) involved then I don't see any harm.

Remember if you want to participate in your own 30 Days of Kink, follow this link!
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30 Days of Kink

This month I'd like to reflect on my inner kink. I've seen this floating around the web for some time now and decided to pitch in. I'll be doing mine in weekly installments. If you want to participate or see where I got the idea, check it out over here.

So here are my 30 Days of Kink

Day 1. Dom, sub, switch? What part of BDSM interest you? Give us an interesting in-depth definition of what that means to you. Basically define your kinky self for us.

I always struggle when I have to define myself in terms of my kinky self. I am a dominant woman overall. I am still myself but I take all the attributes that normally are seen as negative within a woman and use them to my advantage and will. Instead of headstrong, confident, opinionated, decisive being flaws, I turn them into the very things other desire to have.

Day 2. List your kinks 
Seriously? Oh I have way too many to name but a few of my favorite are spanking, queening, chastity, light humiliation, discrete public play, mind control, sensory restrictions, puppy play, begging, tease & denial, light bondage, breath play, mummification, scratching, mild pain, body & foot worship, and of course collars and leashes.

Day 3. How did you discover you were kinky? 
For me it wasn't as if a light bulb went off. I've always known that my sexual interests were a bit unconventional, not even extreme but for me the typical relationship and sexual encounter never left me completely satisfied. The older I got the less I fought against it. Once I realized there were other people with the same interests I was delighted to have found a place where I wasn't frowned upon but rather understood and if not, tried to be understood. It's nice not to be judged.

Day 4. Any early experiences that, in retrospect, hint at your kinks? 
Certainly. I have always been drawn to rather submissive guys now that I look back. Dominant men and myself have had our fun but it was intense and felt like more of a power struggle. I am a total alpha woman, when a man questions me I feel the need to flex my breasts and show that I have just as much authority as he does with his penis. My vanilla relationships with dominant men have always ended rather dramatically and our time together was usually tumultuous.  
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Shake your money maker

The thumpa-thumpa that is synonymous with clubs rallied around me, piercing my veins.

I love that feeling. The feeling that the club is sustaining you.

Despite the drunken mishaps of a bachelorette sitting next to me I was having a good time. It was shaping up to be a good 21st birthday outing for my friend. He had a twinkle in his eye that told me I had made a good choice by bringing him to one of my favorite gay clubs.

Two drinks in and he was already bouncing on the edge of his seat. I, on the other hand had my eye on something more special...the hot guy gyrating on the bar. He was scantily clad in only a banana-hammock and glistening skin. He winked and smiled at me.

I knew better than that. He was a stripper and he just wanted my money. Honestly, I wanted to give it to him, but I'm a smart strip club goer. I know how to stretch my money in that atmosphere.

I heard a muffled voice come thru on the loud speaker but was lost in thought as my friend screamed over the music.

"You bitch! You didn't tell me there was a drag show tonight!" he beamed.

I nodded with a smile.

What unfolded was better than I imagined. It's been awhile since I've seen a proper drag show but these ladies brought their A-game that night. They did back flips, splits, twirls and everything in between...all while wearing 6-inch heels!

Among the other birthday attendees I pushed my friend up to be sung "Happy Birthday" to by the drag queens and they covered him with well wishes.

We retreated to the upper portion of the club where the dancers were fully nude.

Certainly my kind of scene. We remained poised as we went around eying the ones we liked.

When a man with a cock that begged to be seen started dancing on the wall for us. His front was a great as his back when he turned around and I saw his plump ass.

He humped the floor, working his hips, making his ass bounce almost in time with the music.

He was drawing a small crowd.

"I want to spank him!" I whispered loudly to my friend.

I waited for the crowd to dissipate slowly before I approached him.

He had a cute smirk under that baseball cap.

I sauntered over and beckoned him with my pointer finger. He crawled over to me.

"You have an amazing ass, I really want to spank you, if that's okay?" I asked.

He nodded and said, "Sure!"

A man after my own heart. I took my dominant hand and spanked his right cheek several times. Not too hard, not too soft...a perfect spank.

Afterward we went back downstairs with our drinks and danced but my stripper was back. The banana hammock wearing oily hotness that I couldn't take my eyes off of.

He was worth staring at.

I couldn't help myself as I walked over to him and looked up at him as if he were a work of art. He wiggled down to my level and pushed his crotch inches from my face. I smiled in delight. I took a dollar bill from my bra and held it in front of him. Then I tore it in half.

I stuck one half his front and said loud enough for him to hear, "You're going have to work for the other half."

He danced for me on the bar as if I were the only one watching. I ran my hand up and down his highly toned calf muscle; which is usually a no-no but his eyes told me it was okay.

I took the other half of my George Washington and tucked it under his right cheek between his undies and the flesh hugging them.

My friend was dragging me away, it was after all his birthday.

Then my stripper jumped down from the bar and walked back over for a quick moment.

"God! Please tell me you're gay so I can stop fantasizing about all the things I want to do to you."

He answered with a laugh and an accent, "No, I'm straight."

You can't put that kind of bait in front a woman and not expect her to want more. So hopefully he'll be there when I return next weekend.
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When the going gets tough

...some "submissives" do too.

A few of you noticed the lack of test results up Sunday and for good reason. I'd like to say I was surprised but in actuality I kind of saw (and even anticipated) writer sub and myself not making it thru the training.

I've always wondered what "irreconcilable differences" really meant on separation papers, but I get it now, it's a nice way of saying "It's complicated"

So I'll leave it at that...writer sub and I were complicated and there's no easy compromise so I wish him luck in finding whatever he is seeking.

Good thing I'm an artist because it's back to the drawing board...
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Up, up, and away

Even while jet-setting writer sub continues to be a good little panty boy for his Mistress...

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"Rules, Rituals, & Protocol" test results (Week 6)

I am a firm but loving Mistress and I like things the way I like things.

Which is why this week's training was one of my favorite topics to cover. I must admit that writer sub and I have interacted in a rather relaxed form of D/s thus far. He is free to speak and express ideas openly. He may ask for permission to do something but once granted admission he may stand, walk, and get whatever it is he's requested with no limitations. While I want to maintain his ability to flourish as his own submissive, I need him to be structured enough to be my submissive. Without certain rituals, rules, and protocols we are merely scratching the surface of all we could be.

So this week I have implicated and taught him the following:

-An "Entrance Ritual" that is to be performed anytime time he sees me for the first time of the day.

-An "Exit Ritual" that is used whenever he is leaving my presence for the day.

-Certain speech restrictions---he may no longer use the following words: No, Why, Me, I, My, or Mine but is to simply refer to himself as "your submissive".

Also in place are other general rules and I have enlightened him on the three levels of D/s protocol: Low, High, and Social.

I tested him in the following areas and I still enjoy the "Exit Ritual" the most...

Step 1: Upon completing daily duties, recite your closing to your Mistress: "I have completed my duties today Mistress and request to leave if there is nothing further you require?"

Step 2: Kiss your Mistress's feet or shoes

Step 3: If Mistress dismisses you, retrieve clothing and put it on, then kneel

Step 4: Await Mistress to remove your collar, once collar is removed you are free to leave

...as there's just something about having a submissive on hands and knees kissing my feet.

All of our hard work is paying off as writer sub kept his streak of success going.

Total Score :        90 /100        Pass     

Next week we will focus on "Communication" and afterward there is only one special week of training left. It's all quite exciting!
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All dressed up with somewhere to go

For me I've never been typically attracted to the "manly" man. I tend to gravitate toward guys who I can fantasize about overpowering or having a fair chance at an arm wrestle match with.

So it should've come a lot sooner to my attention that feminization, forced or otherwise, would be a fun fetish to explore. I'd seen the videos of men dressed up as little girls, or sissies flaunting their panties and didn't pay it a second thought. Until one night walking home, I got cat-called...

"Damn girl! You have any fries with that shake?"

This was a popular hang out for the trannies and I never had paid them any attention, but when one yelled out to me I instinctively yelled back.

"You know it, but that's extra," I quipped with a  z-shaped air snap, turning to really get a look at the group.

They cackled under the bar sign where they stood in 4 inch heels and skin tight dresses.

It was love at first sight and since then I've had a visual love affair with Drag queens!

They're loud.
They're extreme.
They're bold.
They're fashion Picassos.

What's not to love?

Something about men dressing as women stirred something inside me and I began to use forced feminization on my submissives as a form of punishment.

Painted toes here...
Panties there...
Short skirts...

They pretended not to like it every time I spattered their face with make-up, spanked their asses, and made them walk the runway for me in their overly short skirts but I knew deep down they enjoyed it and secretly their little sissy-boy hearts swelled.

I've since given up on only forcing feminization for punishment and have started to find a real desire to see my submissives turned femme for certain occasions.

I keep teasing writer sub that his time is coming as he's not what I'd describe as a "manly" man and that's not meant as an insult. On the contrary it is quite arousing. He's got a perfectly round bottom, soft hands (he is a writer after all), small feet, lush lips, an adorably round face...

He's going to make quite the femme boy and I'm going to take him out for a "girls' night". It's all I can do in anticipation to see him all dolled up...literally.
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"Etiquette" training test results (Week 5)

Etiquette can always be a odd thing to learn, especially for the completely unrefined. When I was an unruly teenager I was sent to Finishing School in the hopes that it would tame whatever mischievous beast was growling within me...let's just say it didn't completely work as planned. It just made me a pretentious bad ass and evolved into my love for etiquette as an adult. Just more ways for me to prove I have better manners than you hehe.

Lucky  for me my little subbie is a sponge who is good (and hopefully enjoys) absorbing all the knowledge I am instilling on him and that's exactly what he did for the training. He was tested on his Written, Oral (get your mind out of the gutter!), Service and Appearance etiquette.

His appearance was acceptable except for his un-tucked shirt, his newly taught greetings and introductions were spot on, he replicated the following casual dining placement even when I threw in decoy dishes and utensils...

And his written etiquette was perfectly understood and penned with the following handwritten "Thank You" letter attached within his test:

Dear Miss L,

Thank you for training me this week. I appreciate all the time and effort you put into making me a better sub. Your creativity and originality is a pleasure, and I am glad I have been given a chance to experience that with you.

Your submissive in training,
writer sub

Continually exceeding my expectations he passed with flying colors with this score...

Total Score :        95 /100        Pass      

Ooh, next week with my favorite friends Rules, Rituals, and Protocols should be delightfully strict.
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Just say when

Some friends of mine had a heated debate regarding safewords.

Some people hate safewords, feeling that they restrict the natural flow of the relationship and their play time.

Others don't understand their proper place and find them amusing.

While the majority of people use safewords to well...feel safe.

Safewords are pre-determined word(s) or a phrase said at intervals at which you'd like your play partner to alter their actions in a more forgiving manner to prevent any harmful damage.

My stance is that every relationship no matter how old, complicated, or linear in its intentions should acquire a safeword.

The tried and true "Safe, sane, and consensual" saying holds some leverage. If you do want to participate in something that at least appears to be sane then deciding on a safeword is a great start.

I asked a few people what their safewords were and got an electic mix.

There were the usual suspects:

Green=Keep going
Yellow=Slow down

Some non-traditional ones such as:


And the oddly overly prevalent food ones:

Blueberry pancakes

I'm not sure what it says about us kinksters that our minds go to off-the-wall foods for safewords but it's funny to imagine them being yelled out mid-scene.

If you happen to be gagged or have a set of limbs tied you can always use the "tap out" method, or if your eyes are visible use blinking as a safeword. Make sure to discern what means what prior to play. And hopefully you don't have an extra sadistic partner who will revel in delight at your attempts for plea.

That's not to say all relationships will have use for their safewords but it's always nice to have one handy...in case they're tied.
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"Roleplaying" test results (Week 4)

Roleplaying for me is like a lavish meal, if all the details aren't in place it falls flat like biscuits with no butter. So this week's training was especially a fun one for me as anytime I get to flex my creative skills I'm happy. Thru a convoluted series of questions and mysterious phone calls I narrowed writer sub and I's two roleplaying scenarios down for the week.

First up, we had Mad Scientist/Experimentee. This was the first time I'd ever really roleplayed something like this but it turned out fun for us both. My idea of a mad scientist teetered between Magic School Bus wacky and something that would make Doc Brown smile. Thankfully my "experimentee" took it all like a good little patient.

Secondly we roleplayed Secret Past/Blackmailer. In this instance I had some damaging information about his character and he had to convince me not to release it within his personal and professional life. This one was done solely with a webcam, messenger, and our cellphones. I actually took on the role of a male blackmailer which was an interesting twist that I hadn't planned beforehand.

During the week I as well asked him to read some designated material on roleplaying and its nuances and he was tested on the reading and his roleplaying performances (was he convincing? did he stay in character? did he make good use of costumes or props? etc).

No extra credit was given this week. Those have been privileges that I've afforded him. I also threw in some submissive position review and much to my surprise writer sub hadn't forgotten them!

That's why it's no surprise my star pupil scored well above the minimum passing grade of a 75% with a score of...

Total Score :        95 /100        Pass     

You've passed the halfway mark with flying colors writer sub!! I'm so proud of you. I hope you're ready for your Etiquette training next week =)
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Sadie? Check! Sexy? Double check!

If you don't know who Miss Sexie Sadie is then educate yourself. The short version: She's a fellow sexy Blogger who has funneled all of her determination and sexy "tales" in an eBook for us to enjoy. If you don't mind the f-word, detailed sexescapades, self awareness, and overall sexy cougar hunts then this book is for you. Two days, three hot flashes, and a whole lot of laugh-out-louds later I read her book cover to cover. Sadie takes you through the roller coaster she has called life, so strap in and get ready for one wild ride!

Sadie even had a brief encounter with BDSM...here's an excerpt:

I knew nothing about BDSM until we opened our marriage and I started writing about it a year later. Writing my own salacious experiences led me to a community that I didn’t even know existed. And joining that wide-reaching, sex-positive community enabled me to widen my lens to a whole new spectrum of experience. 

And after some time in the community, I thought that I’d seen, or at least heard about it all. But one night I was taken aback. I was left slightly bewildered. I might even say that I was stunned.

My stupefaction asserted itself at a place one might expect it to, at an S&M party I had attended with a friend. But it wasn’t for a reason that I would have expected. I was not distressed at all by the man who was dragging a sharp knife down the back of a naked woman as she giggled in delight. The guy in the corner with the torch, hovering over a bare-fleshed woman, gave me no pause. I was not bothered in the least by the sight of men on leashes or women bound in rope, or the announcement of waterboarding being the consensual cruciation in an upcoming scene. The concentrated, merciless slaps and the cries of anguish combined with resolute pleasure that emanated from each corner of the house didn’t leave the mark upon my psyche like the imprint of a couple whose discernibly precious adoration for each other transcended all of the sadistic, prurient activity that surrounded me.

As the woman stood facing a St. Andrew’s cross—her wrists shackled high above her, feet free from constraints—he beat her. Over and over again he beat her with implements of all sorts. With PVC pipe. With a rubber bat. With his fists. With stair treads. With a flogger. No part of this scene, neither his torture nor her apparent enjoyment of it, caught me off guard. This was what the party was all about, after all. But what did catch me by surprise was when, after he had been pounding her bare ass until it was red and welted and she was shrieking with both agony and felicity, he wrapped his free hand around her neck and pulled her face towards him so that he could kiss her—tenderly—in what might have been the most intimate display of caring affection and nurturing adoration I had seen in a very long time.

I turned to the person I was with, the friend who had brought me there, and whispered, 

Wow. He really, truly, loves her.

And it was true. I could see it. And with each crack of the bat that he struck against her backside after this sweet but brief interlude, I could also feel it. And it surprised me. Caught me off guard. Unexpectedly.

And I realized that it must take guts, lots of guts, as well as a strong sense of self and a heaping handful of respect, to be able to strap a person we love to a cross and beat the crap out of their ass simply because they want us to. Or because, it gets us off. Or both.

It was about then that I recognized a familiar feeling, one that completely stunned me.


And that was when I understood exactly what BDSM was all about.

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